Dear Ask Ashlee,
I have been with my girlfriend for about 3 years, and I fall in love with her just about every day. She is not only beautiful, but she is kind, caring, has a beautiful heart and has loved me through so much! She is my best friend and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. Last week I took her parents out to dinner and pretty much asked for her hand in marriage. Her mother cried a joyous yes and to my surprise her father said no. This man and I have gone fishing together, talk on a regular basis about so many things and we have bonded on so many different levels. I genuinely admire the man, but he told me no without hesitation and left. I have tried calling him a few times and he hasn’t answered. Not that I think it matters, but it goes without saying, that we are a lesbian couple. I have considered going to her parents’ house and confronting him but that might cause more of an issue. My girlfriend’s birthday is next month, and I plan on asking her at that time. Would I be wrong to ask her anyway, despite her father being against it?
Ms. Ready To Pop The Question
Dear Ms. Ready To Pop The Question,
So, here’s the thing, her father’s inability to accept or condone what you and his daughter have going on is his problem and his problem alone. There could be a ton of reasons why he said no, some could be valid, and some could just be a father simply afraid to let go of his baby girl completely. Until he is willing to sit down and talk to you about it, you have to move forward with all the confidence in the world that she is your person, and you are hers. If you think he said no because you two are a lesbian couple, she needs to address that with her father, if she so chooses. Your only concern right now should be how you plan to propose to this woman and what your marriage will look like for you and her, not anyone else. Forever is a long time, so he has forever to accept the love you two share and not, you just focus on your soon to be fiancée’ and everything else will fall into place. I hope this helps!
Love & Light,