Recognizing and managing school-related anxiety in children

Contributed by Cincinnati Children’s Hospital

As children continue in their classes this month, some may experience school-related anxiety. More than 60% of kids will have worries about school at some point. Emily Meyer, a doctor of social work who is a school-based therapist at Cincinnati Children’s, offers these tips to help parents and caregivers recognize school-related anxiety and help children who experience it.  

School-related anxiety can appear in several ways:   

• Avoidance: Kids don’t want to go to school or take a test. They don’t like having to answer questions aloud in class. They’re nervous about who they’ll sit with at lunch.  
• Physical symptoms: Kids may throw up or have a headache, stomachache, or chronic pain. These somatic symptoms are not actually harmful to kids’ bodies.  
• Irritability or moodiness: Kids may feel overwhelmed or out of control due to a “fight-or-flight” response. This can lead to anger outbursts, meltdowns, or tantrums. Kids can be easily frustrated or defiant when stressed.  

How to help   

• Reassure them that they’re safe: Explain that it’s OK to feel nervous. Remind them that you’re just a phone call away.  
• Collaborate with the school: Contact the school counselor or teachers to let them know about your child’s concerns and ensure that your child is not having problems with other students. Discuss what supports the school can put in place to help your child.  
• Fight the urge to rescue them: Help kids face what they’re afraid of rather than allowing them to skip school to avoid situations that are scaring them.  
• Challenge their thoughts: Work through with your child what might happen if a scary thing occurs. For example, if they dropped their lunch tray, people might stare or laugh. But someone might help, and classmates would probably forget quickly.  
• Help them know what to expect: Prepare your child for situations they’re nervous about. For example, walk through their schedule before school begins if they’re concerned about finding their classrooms.  
• Teach coping strategies: Young children can touch a small object kept in their pocket to remind them that they’re brave. Kids of any age can learn how to take deep breaths when they’re anxious. The Coping Skills for Kids website is a great resource: copingskillsforkids.com  
• Create a sense of belonging: Encourage your kids to join a club or sport at school. They’ll meet kids with similar interests and will have a positive association with school.  

Seek help from others

If you notice a significant change in behavior or a lot of avoidance, ask your child’s teachers or counselors what they’re noticing and if they can do anything about it. Speak to your child’s doctor, who may be able to rule out any medical issues and offer recommendations.