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Dear Ask Ashlee,

I left my ex for another man five years ago. I honestly thought that it was what I wanted because we just couldn’t get along and eventually, I felt like we were just on two different paths. Recently, I found out that he is engaged to be married and I feel like I have made a terrible mistake. I’ve dated in the interim of our breakup, but I never considered that he would go and get married so fast when we spent 10 years together to begin with. Am I being ridiculous for feeling this way? I won’t do anything crazy like try to break up their relationship, but I don’t know what to do with everything I am feeling.


Dear Anonymous,

So, here’s the thing, I wouldn’t say your feelings are ridiculous, however you were probably right with your first thought. Is it possible you made a mistake? Maybe, but it is more likely that you are having old feelings stir up because he has moved on and you haven’t. I don’t mean moved on by dating other men, but moved on in the capacity in which you have focused on yourself and dealt with underlying issues you may have about yourself. The breakup was probably the best thing for you both, but as time went on about your dating business, it is possible that he took time to figure out what he needed to work on and now he has found his person. This revelation isn’t a sign that yours will never come, yours will just come within its own time. My advice? Wish him well from a distance and allow him to be happy. Your forever will come too. I hope this helps!

Love & Light,


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